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The Broke Bitch

'Bitches get stuff done.' Broke bitches get stuff done at the expense of their dignity.

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Author: The Broke Bitch

I'm broke, bitch.
August 25, 2019The Broke Bitch

Thirty, Flirty, and Dying

Guys. I’m 30. Holy shit. Prepare the lamb for blood sacrifice.

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May 21, 2019May 22, 2019The Broke Bitch

My Body Is Not a Temple

A freestyled massage poem.

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May 9, 2019The Broke Bitch

Hello from the Other Side

I must’ve called a thousand tiiiiiimes.

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March 6, 2019March 7, 2019The Broke Bitch

I’m Fine, Thanks

Hey, bitches. I’m alive. And I’m perma-working from home, so get ready for some long-ass, rambling posts about nothing.

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January 20, 2019The Broke Bitch

New Year, No Fucks

I should get, “Just because you have a sudden urge to weep, that doesn’t mean you’ve made a mistake” tattooed to my back.

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December 17, 2018December 20, 2018The Broke Bitch

Glass Half Decade

There’s a party happening somewhere in my building complex. I can hear it through my closed windows. They’re probably chugging alcohol through their buttholes, but what do I know? I’m watching Moana before it leaves Netflix—who am I to judge?

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November 8, 2018The Broke Bitch

From Hell

“Are you okay?” my inner voice asked, as I shakily poured wine into an adult sippy cup to take my dog out for a walk. No, not really, but thanks for asking, Concerned Inner Voice of My Empty Being.

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October 24, 2018October 24, 2018The Broke Bitch

In Sickness and In Health

I’ve had several people from my Facebook fan club recently tell me some variation of, “You’re hilarious but I’m concerned about you.” A just concern, my dear friends, a just concern.

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August 23, 2018August 23, 2018The Broke Bitch

Crazy Broke Asian: A Movie Review

Well, as I shouted from my seat in the theater as Coldplay’s “Yellow” in Mandarin played over the final scenes and the credits began to roll, “I AM SO FAT AND UGLY AND BROKE.”

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August 12, 2018The Broke Bitch

The Broke Bitch Bootlegs #SelfCare, Pt 2

I’m trying.

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